Thursday, February 25, 2010

How my mind works.

For all of you who wanted a Shawna eyed view (I know that is most of you, especially you Cindy.)

So here goes.... Marshall told me he was going on a dirt biking trip with his buddies from work for five days in Nevada. My first thoughts were good for him, he's got friends. I actually thought this sincerely so I get points for that. My next thought was he deserves this because he works hard and has put in so much overtime this last year. I also get points for that. However seconds later I had the epiphany and it was not a good epiphany. So if Marshall gets to go on a trip with his buddies sans responsibility... WHAT DO I GET!!!
I tried so hard to put this out of my mind, SO HARD. Unfortunately selflessness is not an endearing quality of mine. So I let it sink in a few days trying really hard to argue Marshall's side.
1. He works a 50 hour week sometimes more.
2. He never takes vacation time, he needs a break.
3. He has never gone on a trip like this before.
4. He normally lets me go dirtbiking with him and doesn't complain about me not being very good.
5. He's a great husband and father!
So I got by for a little while thinking Marshall deserves this, unfortunately it was only a little while. The minute I started arguing a side for Marshall my all too cunning instincts kicked in and said what the heck, you should be arguing for yourself.
My selfish Shawna said
1. I work a 30 hour week and come home and work a 138 hour week.
2. I never take vacation time, but I beg Marshall to so we can go somewhere as a family, because I need a break.
3. I have NEVER gone on a trip like that before, but if I did I am sure it would include kids and diapers and yelling and lots of laundry when I finally came home.
4. I have been pregnant the last 2 dirt biking seasons so reason four lost a lot of credibility. And I'm really a pretty good rider, sort of, for a wife at least, okay maybe not.
5. This reason was hard to argue, but occassionally Marshall made it very easy to argue. I won't go into those details on a public blog, however I will in the church foyer (two very similar entities.)

So my mind got the best of me but I still had a trump card. I would let Marshall plead his case. So a couple nights before Marshall was to leave I played him. I said that we should come up with ideas on how to make our relationship fair without having to resort to score taking. For one because I could never afford to keep up with Marshall (he'll rib me for this one), and second because I once heard that sefishness was the third leading cause of divorce. He ended up failing miserably and I mean miserably. In fact by the end I had a lot more reasons for me going to Nevada than Marshall.

Funny thing is I didn't care to argue about Marshall going on a trip or anything else I just wanted to hear him tell me I was a great wife and mother and that he loved me and that it was warranted how I felt....

Ahhh who am I kidding, I wanted him to tell me I was a bigger person than he was AND I wanted to go to Disneyland.

but really I hope you have fun hunny! Just remember I now have more points.

3 comments:

Jon Woodins said...

Shawna, Jon and I have this same selfish argument EVERY hunting season. He still goes and I still make him pay for it. it started out small. like for every penny he spent on hunting I got the same amount to spend on me however I wanted. for all of the hours away for home I got that many hours in him doing housework and babysitting. And we will not even get into what he owes me for ignoring me while he watches some game that is really "important" but seriously. As husbands go we both got winners. can you imagine how crappy life would be if they wouldn't go to work or pay the bills or help out with the kids once in a while? I like Jon around the house but I like him alot better sometimes when he is gone. :) then I can go shopping!;)

Cindy said...

Shawna,
You are crazy if you talk like that in your head! (Oh, who am I kidding I do the same thing)

Katie said...

That is great. I feel that way all the time. Especially after running my daycare all week. Mom's need and break just as much or more then dad's do. I want a vacation with not kids, diapers, or laundry when I get back, that would be great.